Decisions - What if you really don't know
Since a I was a little girl they taught me to make a list with pro’s and cons if you have difficulties with deciding what to do. However this is just rational thinking. Getting in touch with my true feelings showed me that you can feel something else, even if your list is full of pro’s.
I grew up in a very loving family, however getting in touch with my feeling is something my family nor my environment teached me. Just like most wealthy sociaties we create high standarts for ourselves. You have to get good grades in school, get the highest education as possible and afterwards find yourself a succesfull job. Unless you have a clear vision that you want to become a pilot, doctor or teacher for example, we create to less space to actual dig deeper to find our true desires. So we work our but off and live by (made up) expectations of others. Next to that we also need to have a social life, being a member of a sport club and do all the other instagram worthy things. Forget your feelings, suck it up and do what everybody does. This is how I lived my life and it was not an option that there was another way of living. However nobody can't live like this forever, so just as many others I ended up in a burn-out 1,5 year ago.
If I learned something the last 1,5 year, it is the importancy of getting in touch with my emotions and feelings. It is still very hard to really feel what you need sometimes, but that takes practice every day. It takes dedication, but ending up where I was 1,5 year ago will not happen to me again!
My holistic coach and dear friend Demian Burgenik taught me that there is a question you can ask yourself in case of uncertainty. Is the answer of your question a choice made out of love or out of fear? Are you making a decision because you are afraid for certain consequences? Or are you making a choice out of love? Love for yourself, love for someone else? Love for a better life? When you think about both options it may clarify a lot!
If you want to bring light in a dark place, listening to your heart is the only option that you have. How hard it may be and how misunderstood you might get.
I realised that this is something that happens to me more often. That I am making decisions that doesn't seem to be logical at all, but I know from deep down that I have got to do it. For example I was traveling in Thailand and Indonesia three months ago. When I was in Bali I knew that I had to come back as soon as possible. I did not knew how or when, but I felt brave enough to say it out loud. I told a few people I will be back very very soon! And within two months I made it happen. I made some really difficult decions, started my own business, bought a ticket and left my beautiful city. I could have stayed because of fear. Fear of losing friends, of being not fully able to be there for others, of not being succesfull, of money problems, of getting home sick, etc. Instead I choose for love. Love for myself. I trust that as long as I surf on this intuitive flow magical things will happen!